"May I have your attention please, this is your captain speaking. I'm going to have to ask that you remain in your seats and buckle your saftey belts because we're about to be hit by UnXpected Turbulence"

Q: Beverage of choice?
A: A-grade jet fuel

Q: Likes?
A: Skates on a plane

Q: Dislikes?
A: Long lay-overs, sunny days, lines at the baggage claim, and delayed flights.